hello, oh nine!

every new year, we receive the usual greeting smses like

"happy new year! may luck & happiness be with you and your family in year 2009!"
"happy new year to you and your family. may 2009 be a blessed and fruitful year."
"a new year.
a new start.
a new chapter.
a new beginning.
forget the bad.
cherish the good.
i wish u a happy new year."

i usually don't bother replying these mass generic smses. there's just been an overkill of generic smses that it just doesn't mean a thing to me anymore.

that was, until i read this sms which was sent to alvin. it's something different to the rest, it made me laugh.
"may you be as handsome as your mother thinks, as rich as your child believes, and may you have as many women as your wife suspects! i wish that you may have the courage of David, the meekness of Joseph, the faithfulness of Moses, the obedience of Abraham, the wisdom of Solomon and the penis of Goliath!"

if i were to send it out to women, it'd go something more like this:
"may you be as skinny as you think, as beautiful as your lover believes, and may you have as many handbags as your husband suspects! i wish that you may have the wealth of Oprah Winfrey, the lips of Angelina Jolie, the body of Jessica Alba, the wit of Natalie Portman, the wardrobe of SJP and if you do, stay the hell away from me and my boyfriend! enjoy 2009, bitch!"